I drove you home.
I said goodnight.
I tried to sleep.
I saw first light.

Sometimes I don’t even know myself
What I’m expecting.
Life is over there on some shelf.
Dust’s collecting.

I drove you home.
I took your hand.
I had to ask.
It wasn’t planned.
It felt like death.
You didn’t speak.
I held my breath.
And I felt weak.
I held my breath.
I’ll hold my breath.
I’ll hold my breath
Another week.

Life is over there on some shelf.
Dust’s collecting.
Oh, I drove you home
I took your hand.
I had to ask.
It wasn’t planned.
It felt like death.
You didn’t speak.
I held my breath.
And I felt weak.
I held my breath.
I’ll hold my breath
I’ll hold my breath
Another week.

I held my breath.
I’ll hold my breath
I’ll hold my breath
Another week.

Oh. Oh.
And the mothers work.
And the children play.
And the fathers ran away.
The fathers.
The fathers ran away.
The fathers.
The fathers ran away.

Hold your breath.
Count to ten.
No telling when he might come back again.

We are the children of a fatherless place.
Don’t you see us standing with our brothers sharing Mother’s face.
And the brother’s heading out before he get too sick.
But the sister’s staying home because the sister’s quick.
Don’t you know you run when you’re angry
When there’s nowhere to go
You run away one day. History say it so.
You chase the sun cuz the earth don’t shed a single grain.
Yeah daddy run run run but he don’t break the chain.

And the mothers work.
And the children play.
And the fathers ran away.
The fathers.
The fathers ran away.
The fathers.
The fathers ran.
The fathers ran away.

When you’re rich, when the coast is clear,
(Come back, come back.)
When you strike at gold, if you’re not too old
(Come back. Bring it here.)
‘Cause Momma’s waiting at the kitchen door.
She’s waiting and waiting and I’m not sure
She’ll even know what she’s waiting for til she hear you’re here.

When the stars go pitch black,
When your feet dry and crack,
When your mind and your soul and your hard hard heart attack.

When you can’t remember what you’re running to
When you cross the desert, seeing Timbuktu
With your hands full of sand,
let the sand run through
And then you
(Hold your breath.)
Come back. Come back.
(Count to ten.)
Come back. Come back.
(No telling when)
He might come back again.

One. Two. Three. Four.
(Come back. Come back.)
Five. Six. Seven. Eight.
Oh, Nine.
(Oh. Oh.)
Ten.

No one here to save me, no one here to break me,
break us from this repetition, bad tradition,
break us from the precondition.
Baby girl is born. Baby gonna die.
Maybe baby girl don’t wanna live and die before she fly.
She wanna run. Run.
Run daddy.
Run daddy.
Run!

The fathers.
The fathers ran away.
The fathers.
The fathers ran away.

Don’t you know you run when you’re angry,
When there’s nowhere to go.
You run away one day. History say it so.
(And the mothers work.
And the children play.
And the fathers ran away.)
History say it so.
(And the mothers work.
And the children play.)
And the fathers ran away.

Two A.M. and you know
The Party’s got a dreamy glow.
There’s couples pairing off now.
The time has come for drunken love.
But you see,
There’s no one here but you and me.
So let’s play tonsil hockey.
The night is young.
Whoa-oh-oh.
Just this one time.
Don’t play hard to get now.
You know you kinda sorta wanna
So let’s get down.
The lights are low.
The mood is so right.
Whoa-oh-oh-oh.

WOMAN 1
Late night. What’s to lose?

WOMAN 3
When we can blame it on the booze.

WOMAN 1
Another drunken hook-up.

WOMAN 3
Another night you can’t recall or prevent.

WOMAN 1, WOMAN 3
It’s just a fun experiment.

WOMAN 3
So drop the inhibitions.

WOMAN 1, WOMAN 3
And just let go.
Whoa-oh-oh.
Just this one time.
Don’t play hard to get now.
You know you kinda sorta wanna
So let’s get down.
The lights are low,
And it’s not a crime.
Whoa-oh-oh-oh.
Whoa-oh-oh.
Just this one time.
Don’t play hard to get now.
You know you really really wanna
So let’s get down.
The lights are low,
And it’s not a crime.
Whoa-oh-oh-oh.
Whoa-oh-oh-oh.
Whoa-oh-oh-oh.
Just this one time.
Just this one time.
One time.
One.

Remember this setting.
Take in the view from above.
Mountainous,
Infinite,
Mile upon mile of the danger you love.
It’s colder than winter.
The vertigo’s starting to lift.
Don’t try to touch.
Don’t warm me too much.
You’re causing a tectonic shift.

Because I’m falling.
I’m falling.
I’m out of control.
And it feels like falling nowhere.
The sign ahead says beware.

Here comes an avalanche,
Gaining speed and ice and snow.
Beware the avalanche.
I don’t know how to let go.
I don’t know how to let go.

Don’t act like it’s simple.
Don’t say it’s nothing at all.
Balancing,
Teetering,
Pitched to the brink ’til you start to snowball.
Just skimming the surface -
Well, I dig a little too deep.
I see the cracks.
I weight all the facts.
I try to pull myself out but it’s steep -

And I’m falling.
I’m falling.
I’m out of control.
And it feels like falling nowhere.
The sign ahead says beware.

Here comes the avalanche.
Run for cover and hide or you’ll never survive me.
I am an avalanche.
You’ll never get out alive.
I don’t know how you’ll survive.

‘Cause I’m the destroyer.
I am the huntress.
I’m the lonely one,
The only one.
I am the heartbroken.
I am the unspoken.
I have nothing inside left to give.
Except for this avalanche.
Only an avalanche.
And love.
Because I’m in love.
I’m in love with you.
In love.
Love.
Love.
Love.
Love.

Here comes the avalanche,
Gaining speed and ice and snow.
We’re in an avalanche.
Teach me,
I want to let go.
Catch me -
I’m letting go.
So let it snow.
We’re in an avalanche.
It’s all an avalanche.
We are an avalanche.

And we’re falling.
We’re falling.
Falling,
Falling.
Watch out below.

There’s no second chance.
You get one chance and they don’t let you start again.
You get that break,
You get that phone call,
And you don’t choose how or when.
Calling the losers,
Taking a quarter life vacation.
Calling the slackers.
Calling the sleeping generation.

Wake up.
Wake up.
Wake up.
Wake up.

You felt so young,
You felt so bright,
And now you’re twenty-five and dead.
You’d change your life,
You’d change the world,
If you could just get out of bed.
Calling the losers,
Taking a quarter-life vacation.
Calling the slackers.
Calling the sleeping generation.

Wake up.
Wake up.
Wake up.
Wake up.

So what?
Everything’s all fucked up.
Your life,
Your job,
Your dreams of being the next Bill Gates?
(Uh oh - what’s that?
Oh, do I spy a little beer gut?)
And do I spy a little beer gut?
It’s growing but so what?
Get up!
Get up out of bed.
Instead of jamming headphones onto your stupid sleepy apoplectic head,
Go!
Go prove that you’re not dead yet.

‘Cause there’s just one chance.
You get one chance and they don’t let you start again.
You get that break.
You get that phone call and you don’t choose how or when.
Calling the losers,
Taking a quarter-life vacation.
Calling the slackers.
Calling the sleeping generation.

Wake up.
Wake up.
Wake up.
Wake up.
(Ride out.)

Happy drunk,
Grinding to a German techno beat.
Shots all around.
I’m drafting you a text.
I’m typing sorry.
I’m sleepy.
Another night.
Sadface ox.
Vodka flows into any mixer you can find.
Mini skirts shift.
I see the lift of her ass.
My pocket vibrates.
I won’t look.
It’s you again.
And you’re not here.
She makes a pass.
Screw the phone.
Screw you and all your stupid rules.
Are you alone?
Are you dancing by yourself?
Cuz I’m out here.
Alive here.
We’re dancing here.
Chugging from the bottom shelf.

This is how it feels to fall in love.
This is how it feels to fall.
The weakness, the sadness,
The sirens, the madness.
The pounding in your chest,
Like you’re racing the streets in an ambulance.
I’m watching you.
I’m watching me.
I’m watching us fall.
Fall.

Do I see you standing across the crowded room?
Like some montage or like someone’s fucking dream,
And I see you.
In her face.
In every face.
Is that your scheme?
I’m watching you.
I’m watching me.
I’m watching us…

I’m so sick of parties.
I’m so sick of being drunk.
I hold my breath.
Lips brush against my ear.
But I don’t feel them.
Or know them.
I just know you.
And you’re not here.
And you’re not here.
Yes, it might be the Smirnoff or all the Natty light.
Yes it is weak.
But there’s nothing left to lose.
So call me right now and I’ll cave.
I’ll answer you and blame the booze.

Time is passing but we’re still drinking.
Life is passing us by,
We’re drinking last week’s alcohol.

House parties are proof the world runs to chaos.
I go outside and that’s when I see you.
And you say,
Don’t talk.
I’m sorry.
I’m scared of this.
Well, I’m scared too.

This is how it feels to fall in love.
This is how it feels to fall.
The weakness, the sadness,
The sirens, the madness.
The pounding in your chest,
Like you’re racing the streets in an ambulance.
I’m watching you.
I’m watching me.
I’m watching us fall.

So there’s this girl and there’s this guy,
Off and on they date.
She says they’ve been going out for several months.
He calls it a year and eight.
But all right.
See,
He’s always doing stupid things like that.
He’s always rounding up and always keeping score.
He wants control,
He wants a dog,
He wants a one year anniversary and more.
And so he tries to break her armor down with his sneaky little grin.
Tries to push her towards the edge.
She just digs her heels right in.
He sends roses like grenades,
Thinking she will show her hand.
Thinking she wants accolades.
He doesn’t understand:
That’s not her way.
That’s not how she goes.
She has no need to label something she already knows.
See he wants control.
He wants her to break.
He wants to take things year by year.
She wants to live them day by day.
And that’s not a threat.
She does not make threats.
That’s not my way…
Her way.

Sometimes a person doesn’t get it.
They just don’t understand.
Sometimes a person wants his heart pressed ’til it bleeds.
Sometimes it only takes a moment to see what you really need.
And she sees it -
Sees a blinding brilliant light,
Spies a path cut through the black.
Takes off running through the night,
Never stops,
Never looks back.
Pavement lapping at her feet,
And the rain pelting her eyes as she stares down the dark street,
Someone’s screaming “compromise!”
But that’s not her way.
That’s not what she does.
She is the sturdy one,
The callous one.
She is,
She always was.
That was all made clear.
I guess he forgot.
Whether or not he understood,
He had been cautioned all along.
So it was not just,
And it was not fair…

But it was wrong that when he dropped to one knee,
She sort of laughed instead of cried.
And when she saw he had a ring,
She couldn’t breathe and ran outside.
It was just one more deal in a game they’d played a few times.
All for his validation.
All for his fears,
All victimless crimes,
Right?
Just part of the plan,
Right?
There was always a plan,
Right?
Right?
Right!
Well she ran.
He was coming up behind her.
She ran,
Trying to think of places no one else would find her.
She had warned that man.
So she ran,
And she ran,
And she ran,
And she ran!

So fuck your plan.
I am not amused.
You go script things out,
But I’ll stay here.
I’ll be the one to choose.
We are not all right.
We are not okay.
I must not have been clear enough.
I guess i meant to say,
You are not my life.
You are not my soul.
You are someone who’s a part of me.
You are not in control.
And that’s not your fault.
It was my mistake.
I couldn’t find the words to say I couldn’t stay.
It’s just not my way.

I really don’t know what I’m doing here.
I don’t have anything to share.
I guess I’m here to explain myself,
Why I went and where.
And I guess that’s fair.

I’m only human.
I’ve made some mistakes.
I don’t think I should apologize.
We make our own decisions.
We don’t get to make revisions.
I didn’t have a grand plan.
I don’t know why I started driving or where it all began.
All I know is the feeling of having to say I’m the girl who drove away.

I have no excuse to make.
How the road was calling doesn’t matter at all.
How I dreamed of highways beckoning I forgot it was an illusion.
It led to the wrong conclusion.
I thought I proved I was strong.
But when the highway reached the ocean,
I realized I was wrong.
Standing there,
Like a fool –
That’s the price that I pay as the girl who drove away.

But I still feel it.
The way the day blows across the sky.
And how the miles keep on flying by.
I swear I’d never seen this kind of deep orange sunset.
It’s almost worth the regret.

I’m not complaining.
I don’t have a right.
I have made my choice,
I live with it,
But I don’t sleep at all now.
The leaves start to turn,
It’s fall now.
I don’t why I left home.
And I no longer see why a smart girl like me ever wanted to be the girl who packed her bags,
And loaded her dad’s old Sudan,
That desp’rate girl who ran from the future spelled out in her DNA,
From the life she deserved,
And who stands here today.
The girl who drove away.

* Please note that this version of the song does not actually occur in SAM BROWN. It is the first version that we wrote. You can view the subsequent version that occurs in SAM BROWN here. This is the only version that we are releasing sheet music for at this time.

It starts as nothing,
Just a thought or a dream.
Then one day you’re in the driver’s seat,
The key is in the ignition,
And no one gave you permission.
It’s only you in the car.
Before you even know you’re driving,
You are.
And your heart is racing.
All at once,
Something changes inside and you say
“I’m the girl who drove away.”

And there’s no time for regret.
When the road is calling,
And you have to respond,
There’s no fear of flight or looking back.
Straight ahead,
Things couldn’t be clearer.
Your life’s in the rear-view mirror.
You’re reaching for the unknown,
The chance to find an open road of your own.
With the past behind you,
Right and wrong start to feel more like two shades of gray to the girl who drove away.

Sure there’s guilt.
Sure there’s pain.
It’s nothing next to the boredom that was rotting my brain.
Sure the car could use a repair.
But the life I led from school to bed could never compare to the way the day blows across the sky,
And how the miles keep on flying by,
The way dawn’s breaking,
The sun’s nearly waking the life inside me.
And all I did was turn a key.

*This is the version that appears in the show. It is different than the original solo version that we wrote (which we like very much but which doesn’t fit with the show quite as well). We will NOT be releasing this version of the sheet music until the vocal score and selections of SAM BROWN are released.